Southern Belle 101

Cassidy Anthony

Posted on May 25 2017

Southern Belle 101

The term ‘Country Girl’ is kind of like the term ‘Business Owner’, it’s overused and can mean a lot of different things. Pretty much any girl can call themselves a Country Girl. You like country music? You’re a Country Girl. You wore boots five years ago? You’re a Country Girl.

A Southern Belle, however, is different than a Country Girl. Southern Belle’s are a rare breed, and if you know one you better hold on tight to her.

There is something called “The “Unwritten Rules for a Southern Belle”, in reality they aren’t rules to us(Southern Belle’s). They are actions and thoughts that just come natural to us.

So, in the spirit of the South, I have made a gift for all Belle’s! The Southern Belle101. It describes who we are and what we live by. It gives boys a chance to learn how to impress us. And it gives facts about, not just us, but The South in general! So, let’s teach everybody else what the meaning of life is, shall we?

Down South Facts

  1. Jesus Lovin’ and a lil Stubborn
  2. Pearls with blue jeans is classy
  3. The higher the hair the closer to Jesus
  4. We are gunna make a pot of coffee when you come over.
  5. Big Brothers are bodyguards
  6. Even if we’ve never met you, we’re still gonna hug your neck
  7. Sunday’s Schedule: Church-Lunch-Football/Nap
  8. Mama is our best friend and daddy’s tough
  9. Booms Farm is Classy
  10. Don’t let mawmaw catch you outside without any sunblock on
  11. Get up and let your elders sit down
  12. We know our family history and we are proud to share it
  13. Flip Flops are worn year round
  14. If you can eat it, you can fry it
  15. Nothin’ is sweeter than a Southern Belle Cheerleader
  16. 75% of the time are spent barefoot
  17. EVERYTHING taste better with Tony’s
  18. We’re all Hard Headed and Hott Blooded
  19. If it’s “about to get ugly”, you better simmer down or run
  20.  No one runs with scissors if mama’s around
  21. SLOW. COOKER.
  22. There are two types of boots; work boots and boot scootin boots
  23. White trash, hillbilly, redneck, country, trailer trash: ALL DIFFERENT
  24. A Chicken Express Cup looks cooler than a Starbucks Cup
  25. The love of money doesn’t exist
  26. Even if we don’t have room “Yall come stay at the house!”
  27. We know “Sweet Home Alabama” just like we know the Lord’s Prayer
  28. There are like 5 different kinds of coke
  29. Waiting for the Rodeo is like a kid waitin’ for Santa
  30.  There ain't one person who can make gumbo like mawmaw can
  31. Cathead biscuits with tomato gravy is the best thing on earth
  32. “Have you seen the new Camaro Dodge?
  33. We Pray for Rain
  34. Seriously, Country Music is our way of life
  35. The Stockyards is everyone’s backyard
  36. Sunshine really DOES waRsh our blues away!
  37. Everyone tells the same story at least twice
  38.  George Strait > Luke Bryan

Let me tell you about a

Southern Belle

39. We mind our manners… and business

40. We check on mawmaw and pawpaw regularly

50. A big bow and a smile is the best fashion statement

51. “Bless your heart” is our way of cussin’ you out

52. Big City Dream Ranch House

53. We’re only weak when our nails are dryin’

54. We always put our face on before we leave the house

55. The only thing we will suck the head of is crawfish

56. Our accents are as thick as the air

57. It’s not the Notebook. It’s Steel Magnolias.

58. We would never start a fight, but we’ll sure as heck finish one!

59. We wear because we are hunting, not to look cute

60. Our secret is we always act helpless and confused; never tell them how capable we really are

61. Hell hath no fury like a Southern Belle scorned

62. Our Southern Drawl gives us what we want

63. You’ll say our laugh is sexy as sin and full of promise

64. We know how to get and keep our men

65. All of us are crowned Miss. ‘Somethin’

66. Stilettos or boots? - We can do either

67. Our purses are Concealed Handgun Ready

68. We know of plenty of back roads if you wanna go off roadin’

69. Mud looks good on pink

70. We keep koozies in our purse.. Cuz, well, you just never know

71. It’s not cute; It’s SO STINKIN’ Cute!

72. We don’t sweat, we glisten… sometimes a lot

73. The skill of getting the messy bun is mastered

74. Our daddy’s don’t like tattoos

75. Even though we tend to have a few

76. If Daddy doesn’t buy it for us our Pawpaw will

77. We don’t have patience for City Girl, but we’ll never tell them that… Bless their Hearts

78. We play tough

79. There is no Charm like a Southern Charm

Now let’s help the poor 

Boys

80. Gentlemen will  NEVER go outta style

81. If you don’t starch your  jeans, don’t talk to us

82. Deer mounts are impressive, not rolexes

83. We’re going fishing with you

84. And no, we don’t need you to bait our hook

85. WE LIKE BIG TRUCKS AND WE CANNOT LIE!!

86. Daddy won’t give us up to you if you can’t even bait a hook

87. How many pair of boots do you have?

89. You better have a hitch on your truck

90. Brownie Points For Tickets To: Cody Johnson, Josh Abbott, Cross Canadian Ragweed, Aaron Watson, Bart Crow

91. And; Pat Green, Casey Donahew, Chris Knight, Kevin Fowler, Kyle Park  and Randy Rodgers

92. If you can’t gut it or skin it my daddy already doesn’t like you

93. We don’t want your class ring, we want your favorite baseball hat

94. We judge you by the way you treat your Mama.

95. You better take your hat off every time you Pray, which should be everyday

96. Cowboy Up or just get back in the truck

Just a few last things:

97. Laissez Les Bon Temps Roule!

98. Sit up straight

99. Shut the door cuz you’re gonna let all the bugs in

100. It’s just 5 minutes up the road

Last, but not least:

101.

We are ALL

Loud, Proud and Country 

By the Grace of God! 

 

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